A year? I can’t even comprehend that our Gracie has been with us for a year. It seems to have gone by so quickly, but then when I think back to all the things that have happened this year – her birth, doctor appointments, therapy multiple times a week, successful open heart surgery, tubes for her ears, and much more, it seems like it’s been long and busy.
But there have been much more important things that have happened this year than a few medical things…
Our lives have changed.
All for the better.
Gracie bug, I was so scared of you and what you meant for our family when we found out you would be born with a little something extra. I was naive, selfish, stupid, and not trusting of the good gifts that God gives. Boy, was I wrong. I was so mistaken about what you would bring into our lives. It’s not just therapies and appointments and busyness – it’s love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control. These are the things you have brought into our lives and helped us grow to have more of in our hearts.
Could it be? One of the reasons God blessed us with you is to continually make us more like Him?
When I think back to the times of uncertainty, I remember always wondering, “why did we find out now? So early in the pregnancy, with so much unknown?” At the time, it seemed harder for me to constantly be thinking about Down syndrome, instead of thinking about my baby. Does that make sense? But I know now without a shadow of a doubt why we found out early – to help save lives.
In our particular story, we found out at a moment in our pregnancy when a choice could have been made (and was offered multiple times) to take away her life. Although that was never an option in our minds, it still doesn’t mean I wasn’t scared and fearful. This is the story I have been able to share with people who are in the same position as we were. I love being able to tell them – “The way you are feeling right now is OK, but I promise you, you will not feel this way forever. It is going to be amazing”
So Gracie, thank you. Thank you for making me a better person, for making our family better and the people around you better. You are changing stereotypes and battling the ignorance in others like a champ. I am so honored to be your mother.
I am so grateful for this journey and I would never change a thing.